


Piranah

by PinkToby



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Abandon logic all ye who enter here, Bath Sex, Crack, Fish, Hand Jobs, M/M, Masturbation, Pet Play, Terrible jokes at the end, inspired by a tumblr post
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-14
Updated: 2014-05-14
Packaged: 2018-01-24 17:24:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1613222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PinkToby/pseuds/PinkToby
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The birthday smut fic trr_rr never asked for, probably never wanted, but is going to get.</p><p>Inspired by the Tumblr text post by lafeianitric:<br/>"what if people did petplay with other common household pets like imagine sitting in a bathtub filled with aquarium rocks while ur partner sprinkles fishfood on u like “cum for daddy”"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Piranah

**Author's Note:**

  * For [trr_rr](https://archiveofourown.org/users/trr_rr/gifts).



> Because nobody else would appreciate goldfish pet play the way Tara would... 
> 
> Happy birthday, dearest, hope it's excellent!

“Hannibal?”

A sloshing sound echoing inside the large white tub in the far corner of the bathroom heralded Hannibal Lecter’s dramatic emergence from the water. Crystalline droplets dripped from the angles of his face, which held eyes glittering with lust and a mischievous smile on his lips.

“Ah, Will. So nice of you to join me.”

“Yeah, uh, I saw the note on the table…” Will walked into the room and sat on the ledge of the tub, back to the water more out of nervousness than out of respect. Even after all the times he’d seen and been seen by naked Hannibal, he still got embarrassed.

“That’s good to hear.” Hannibal reclined, allowing himself to float leisurely.

“I’ve gotta ask, though…what does this have to do with— _wait, what the fuck is in your bathtub?_ ”

“Colored rocks, most commonly found in aquariums.”

“Okay,” Will rubbed a hand down his face, “But…Time for the million-dollar question: _why_ are there colored aquarium rocks in your bathtub?”

“Do you remember the conversation we had last week, about…oh, how did you put it? ‘Spicing things up’ in the bedroom?”

Will nodded, cheeks suddenly ablaze. It had been horribly embarrassing, full of sputtered statements as Hannibal stared at him with an unreadable expression—not that he was a particularly _readable_ man, Hannibal Lecter, but a small smile or any visible inkling of approval would’ve helped at the time.

“Uh, yes.”

“I thought you might. I must admit, I did not expect you to be so…adventurous when it came to intimacy, but I cannot say I am displeased with this recent development. That is why I decided to take some initiative-“

“By putting aquarium rocks in the bathtub?”

“Yes, Will,” Hannibal smirked, “but, as always, there is good reason behind my actions.”

“I don’t doubt it. Well, go on, Doctor Lecter. Dazzle me with your clever ways.”

“Gladly.” Hannibal closed a dripping hand over Will’s dry one, “The goldfish was first domesticated over a thousand years ago in China, during the Tang dynasty. A member of the carp family, they are one of the most widely-kept aquarium fish in the world-“

“Hannibal, get to the point.”

“I have had many young children in my practice tell me about having pet goldfish. They’re quite popular, for obvious reasons—easy to look after, beautiful to watch—and a perfect starter-pet for instilling responsibility into young minds.”

Will grimaced and started to open his mouth to ask Hannibal to _please, for the love of God, just tell me what this is all about_ , but was silenced by a single raised hand.

“One of the avenues you wished to explore was pet play, was it not? Since we are both new to the experience, I decided to begin with something simple.”

“…By pretending to be a, a _goldfish_?”

“Yes,” Hannibal said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, “Why not start with the basics?”

“But a _goldfish?_ Hannibal, this is like a sex thing. How the _hell_ am I supposed to…y’know… _have sex with a goldfish?_ ” A small cylinder to his left caught Will’s attention, and when he snatched it up, he let out a disgruntled groan. “ _Fish flakes_? Really, Hannibal? You bought _fucking fish flakes_ for this?”

“Of course. Fish require nourishment, just like humans.”

“Oh my God, they’re even _gourmet_. You freakin’ _would_ …” Will placed the containter back down with yet another sigh. All he wanted was some kinky activity in his sex life, and what does he get? A naked psychiatrist floating around in his bathtub, pretending to be a goldfish and expecting Will to get off on it. Typical.

“Alright, Hannibal, you know what?” Will said after a moment of deliberation, “If you wanna be a goldfish, you can be a goldfish. I just…we’ll try it, okay?”

Instead of giving a verbal response, Hannibal immediately let go of Will’s hand and, with a deep, gasping breath, slipped beneath the water.

“Wow, you’re not wasting any time, are you?” Will couldn’t help but smile though. There was something about seeing his lover do something so… _silly_ , even though it was unintentional. As the water settled, Will watched a slow, steady procession of bubbles float up to the surface from Hannibal’s nose. Against the tacky colored gravel, Hannibal still managed to look dignified and strangely beautiful, skin shimmering slightly and hair loose, while burbon-colored eyes squinted and glittered back at Will.

Will let his fingers skate the surface of the water over the sumberged man, running his fingers up and down the length, as if he was touching him, stroking down Hannibal’s skin. There was something so alluring about the whole situation, and Will began to think that maybe, just maybe, this whole ‘fish pet play’ thing might not be so bad, especially when it involved such a beautiful, sensual—

“ _Son of a bitch!”_ Will yelped, withdrawing his hand, “You _bit_ me!”

With his eyes and nose peeking above the water line, Hannibal flashed Will a cheeky underwater grin, teeth that had just been imbedded in Will’s flesh sharp and prominent.

“I thought you were supposed to be a goldfish, not a piranah,” Will grumbled, picking up the container of fish food. He looked at the label for a moment before opening it and taking a pinch of flakes between his thumb and forefinger.

“Here,” Will said, sprinkling the flakes into the water, “since you’re so hungry all of a sudden.”

Hannibal eyed the flakes curiously as they fell and floated on the surface, before making a perfect ‘o’ with his lips and mouthing at the flimsy food. With each motion of his mouth, there was an endearing little popping sound. Will watched Hannibal with a smile on his face—sure it’s weird, but aren’t they a couple of weird people themselves?

“So, I guess I just kind of watch you now, is that it? I mean, that’s what people with fish _do_ , so…” Will put the cap back on the fish flakes and stared at Hannibal, who was now lazily ‘swimming’ in the water.

“You know, you really are beautiful like this, Hannibal,” Will whispered, “A…a very…pretty… _fishy?_ God, I feel like an idiot…”

But, apparently, Hannibal did not think it was idiotic at all. He let out a little hum of appreciation and rolled over happily, water sloshing against the side of the tub.

“Oh, you like being told you’re pretty, do you? Even as a fish, you’re a narcissist…” Will got a frown and a playful splash for that one, but he laughed in spite of his lover’s ire.

“You’re a _pretty_ fish narcissist, though. I could watch you swim around in there all day… Even when you bite me with your freaky fangs, I still think you’re the best pet fish in the whole world. You’re…wait a minute, are you _masturbating_?”

Sure enough, Hannibal had a hand between his outspread thighs and was stroking his half-hard cock at a languid pace.

“Uh…well, I can’t say I’ve ever seen a fish do _that_ before. Not that I’m complaining, but…”

A nearly-inaudible moan comes forth from Hannibal’s lips as he speeds up his motions a smidge. A few tiny colored rocks are shaken from the floor of the tub with the change in pace.

“Does that feel nice?” Will cooed, “I bet it does. I bet the water feels _so good_ around your cock.”

Hannibal’s other hand began foaming his chest, stopping to pinch at his hardened nipples as his hips thrust in time with his hand. Until that moment, Will hadn’t noticed how aroused he had become. He pressed a hand to the front of his slacks and began rubbing, trying to alleviate some of the pressure he felt in his groin.

“God, look at you, all wet and slippery… Even when you pretend to be a fucking goldfish, you manage to get me hot.” Will unzipped his jeans then and took himself in hand, starting up a faster-than-normal rhythm, “Do you see how hard I am right now? I can’t control myself around you.”

Hannibal groaned and began to pump his arm faster. Will knew it wouldn’t be long until Hannibal reached climax, especially if he kept talking to him. Hannibal always responded well to dialogue.

“You’re close, I can tell,” Will rasped, trying to catch up to his lover, “You…you like showing off for me. You like having me watch you, even as you— _shit!—_ even as you jerk off. You’re…you’re gonna make such a mess in the water… And I’m gonna be here, watching the whole time. I’m gonna, _fuck_ , I’m gonna watch you cum. So…so come on, b-be a good pet and lemme see you cum. Cum… _cum for daddy_.”

With his head thrown back and a deep-throated growl, Hannibal came, white streaks of release dancing almost daintily in the water before dissipating. Will felt himself nearing completion embarrassingly fast, but after witnessing such a display, he didn’t care. He worked himself faster, desperate to reach orgasm, and just as he was on the horizon of satisfaction, something grabbed him about the waist…

…And dragging him into the tub.

“Dammit, Hannibal, I-“ Will growled, but before he could protest too much, there was a warm body pressed against his now-soaking back and a hand gripping his cock in a tight embrace and tugging once, twice, thrice—and Will was coming, a whimpered curse flying from his throat.

“Forgive my actions,” Hannibal whispered into Will’s ear as he came down from his orgasmic high, “but I simply couldn’t help myself.”

“It’s, uh…’s fine, I…” Will murmured as he regained his bearings, “That was…uh, that was… _interesting_.”

“Indeed,” Hannibal agreed, “I can see why many couples enjoy pet play, _and_ why they avoid pretending to be goldfish.”

“Fish flakes taste bad?”

“Yes, and there is something wholly unpleasant about having graval embedded in one’s most sensitive areas…”

“Oh, well, your patients and professional acquaintences were half-correct. You don’t have ‘a stick up your ass,’ but, rather, a fair amount of small, brightly-colored rocks.”

“The things I do for love, William…” Hannibal said with a chuckle. “Either way, one of us had best call the Navy…”

“…What the hell are you talking about, Hannibal?”

“Well, there’s certainly a copious amount of _sea men_ in the water. I think they have a right to know.”

“Why, Doctor Lecter, did you just make an attempt at _crude humor_?” Will turned to look at his lover, “Baltimore’s society will be shocked.”

“Go on, tell them all,” Hannibal countered with a devious smile, “Nobody will believe you.”

“I hardly believe it myself,” Will confessed with a laugh, “But, before I go running off to tell the world about the great Doctor Hannibal Lecter’s appaling jokes, I should probably change into something a little less…soaked.”

“Yes,” Hannibal said, pressing a kiss to Will’s cheek, “yes, you should.”

**Author's Note:**

> Fuck this ending it's like 2AM and all my creativity went into those jokes soooooo...
> 
> Hit me up in the comments if you want, or on Tumblr at mean-cannibals.tumblr.com 
> 
> <3


End file.
